The Chimp Paradox - Mind Management Programme for Confidence, Success and Happiness by Prof Steve Peters.
I must admit that I rolled my eyes a bit when Stella asked me if I wanted to read this book, as I'm never sure about 'mind management' books or 'self-help' books, come to think about it, but I was off on a spa holiday and had a bit of time, so...
Well, I can say that it was quite a revelation and really did give me food for thought. The basic premise of the book is that the Psychological Mind is a combination of our frontal, limbic and parietal brains, and Steve calls these the Human, the Chimp and the Computer. These three brains try to work together, but inevitably, there are conflicts and struggles along the way against each other to gain control, and it's often the Chimp that wins!
The Chimp is rather tricky as it's the emotional machine that we all possess, and it offers emotional thoughts and feelings in a very constructive OR very destructive way, so it can be your best friend or worst enemy. Interestingly, you can't choose your Chimp – it was born when you were born, and you need to accept it.
Meanwhile, the Human is our logical thinking – it gathers the facts, establishes the truth and then bases its beliefs on the truth. Whilst the Chimp judges others quickly and without mercy (and is unlikely to be persuaded that it is wrong!), the Human remains open-minded and can change its mind and see someone else's point of view. It doesn't personalise its viewpoint or belief and therefore doesn't become defensive if challenged. (By the way, the computer stores the information that the chimp and human have put into it and then uses this information to act for them automatically.)
The book examines the different aspects of the brain and gives plenty of examples of how they behave, as well as guidance, questions to ask yourself and exercises to do. Each chapter has a key point to make sure that you have understood it too. The aim is to help you become a happy, confident, healthier and more successful person, and most people want that, eh?
I would really recommend you read it if you are interested in exploring the way that you react to situations and other people – reigning in your Chimp might just be the best lesson that you learn in a long while.
And to finish, I really liked the explanation of the 'Stone of Life', which is your ultimate reference points – statements that you believe are true for the way the world works, the principles and ideals that you believe in, what you believe life is all about and how it should be lived. The examples given of what these could be are:
- I am an adult, and I can deal with any situation
- Life is not fair
- Everything that happens comes and goes
- Disappointments are tough, but they need to be kept in perspective
- Happiness can be found in many ways
- It's the way you deal with things, not what happens, that gives you peace of mind
- Every day is precious.
Let the journey begin!
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